In marriage, communication issues can often lead to misunderstandings due to assumptions, conflicts, and emotional distance. However, the success of a relationship lies in how well the couple can resolve these issues. With the help of some effective communication strategies, you can navigate disagreements and build stronger bonds. Let’s explore different ways to improve communication and resolve marital conflicts.
Ways To Resolve Conflicts
The following are the different steps you can undertake to resolve problems in a marital relationship:
Acknowledge Emotions
When a disagreement between you and your partner gets heated, it's normal to feel all sorts of emotions including pain, anger, frustration, disappointment, etc. However, there are people who, instead of expressing feelings, choose to ignore or suppress them. This isn't the right thing to do as the emotions will only intensify if they are not acknowledged, thus escalating the conflict further. So, the first step you need to follow for resolving conflict in marriage is recognising your emotions. Once you understand how you are feeling, you will be able to create a mental space between your feelings and actions. When you acknowledge these feelings, try to recall the love that you and your spouse share. This way, you will be better equipped to regulate yourself during a conflict.
Active Listening
When there's a marital conflict, people often tend to get caught up on your side of the argument and shut down their ability to understand their partners’ feelings and concerns. Active listening is a key tool for effective communication in marriage. You need not be hostile to your spouse. Just like you want to be heard while talking to your partner, they also want you to listen to them. Show empathy in relationships and understand things from their point of view.
Avoid the Blame-Game
The reasons why you may feel tempted to blame your spouse for all the conflicts may be endless - things that they said, did or may not have done. But, nothing good will come of it as they will feel attacked, forcing them to respond to your blame and not to the problem at hand. Make use of I statements that focus on expressing your feelings rather than assigning blame. Sharing how certain actions affected you without blaming is one of the effective communication strategies.
Focus on Non-Verbal Communication
Effective communication and active listening in relationships are the bedrock for its success. When you communicate with your partner, your body language should reflect your intention to resolve the conflict. A calm tone of voice, a concerned facial expression or a reassuring touch can go a long way in diffusing a tense situation. Instead of pacing around the room, try sitting down to talk and make eye contact with your partner. Making eye contact gives them the assurance that you care about their feelings and are ready to listen. This non-verbal communication will help you feel more connected to your partner.
Ask Questions
Instead of an accusation, asking the right questions will often help in resolving conflicts and strengthening relationships. If you are wondering how to ask questions to avoid misunderstandings, these questions might help:
What can we do to make things right?
What do you like to see happen?
What would you want me to change?
When you show that you are interested in what the person thinks or feels, you are building a bridge for communication.
Be Open to Feedback
Feedback in relationships is crucial for avoiding assumptions and gaining clarity. It helps partners understand each other's perspectives, needs, and feelings. Allowing open expression and discussion fosters mutual understanding. For instance, in the movie ‘Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna,’ characters navigate their complex emotions through honest conversations, highlighting the importance of feedback. Finding common ground is achievable only when both partners genuinely try to understand each other's point of view.
Collaborate and Compromise
Relationship counsellors suggest that couples need to follow the give-and-take respect methodology to lead a healthy marriage. You need to be willing to give up on some of your preferences for the sake of your marriage. Keeping your ego aside, both of you need to brainstorm solutions that can fulfil each other's needs. You can also attend a couple therapy sessions and online psychological counselling together to seek assistance in building trust and creating an atmosphere of cooperation.
Handling Intense Emotions
Let's say, your partner has the habit of leaving their towel on the bed after bathing and it annoys you. Instead of blaming them, try asking “I am wondering what could be the reason why you left your towel on the bed after showering?”. Rather than jumping to conclusions, take a deep breath and try to understand their perspective before reacting. Moreover, remind your partner about the bond you share so that you both don't end up saying or doing things that can hurt each other.
Seek Support
Despite your best efforts, you both might still have some communication challenges that you need to overcome. In that case, it is best advised to seek guidance through online counselling for couples or online psychologist consultation. With the help of relationship counselling and therapy, you can learn effective communication techniques to navigate complex issues easily. The best online psychologist in India will offer an unbiased perspective on problems and equip you with the tools to resolve conflicts through online therapy and counselling.
Conflict can happen in any marital relationship from time to time. It's up to you whether you want to handle it in a healthy way or not. By embracing the art of effective communication, compromise and collaboration, you can navigate conflicts successfully and deepen your connection. Seeking professional help through online counselling can provide you with a safe environment for processing and resolving issues. EduPsych has some of the best psychologists online in India who can help you in this process. Currently, we provide the best couples counselling online and online therapy in India services to help promote long-term partnerships.
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